Bed Wetting Causes

Dear Dr. Greene, My eight year old son has wet the bed consistently (about every other night) for as long as I can remember. He feels terrible about it and I feel like a failure as a parent. My mother says it is because he has emotional problems. What is the real cause of bed-wetting? Does anybody know? Please don’t indicate where this question came from, but please get back to me if you possibly can.

Bed Wetting Causes

Dr. Greene’s Answer:

Children who can control their bladders during the day, but who have never been dry at night for at least a six month period, have what is known medically as primary nocturnal enuresis (PNE), the most common form of bed-wetting. Over five million school-age children in the US alone have PNE.

Sadly, most children with PNE feel that there is something wrong with who they are that causes their problem. Many of them feel that it’s the result of either bad thoughts or bad actions. They feel that somehow bed-wetting is a punishment.

Similarly, many parents feel that their children’s bed-wetting is a result of a defect in their parenting. This feeling is heightened by well-meaning friends and relatives who bring up questions of emotional instability as the cause of bed-wetting.

In a recent survey of 9,000 parents of kids ages 6 – 17, 22% stated that they thought the reason their child wet the bed was laziness (survey conducted by ICR Survey Group from July 10, 1996, through August 6, 1996). I am happy to tell you that this could not be further from the truth! Primary nocturnal enuresis is a common developmental phenomenon related to physical and physiologic factors. It does not come from emotional stress, poor self-esteem, or emotional immaturity.

Children with PNE have two things in common. First, they need to urinate at night. Not all children do. During the first months of life, babies urinate around-the-clock. Most adults, however, don’t need to urinate at night (although a small percentage of the population will need to urinate at night throughout life). Sometime in middle childhood, most individuals make the transition from urinating around-the-clock to only urinating during waking hours. There are three reasons why individuals continue to need to urinate at night:

  1. There is an imbalance of the bladder muscles. For example, the muscle that contracts to squeeze the urine out is stronger, at moments, than the sphincter muscle that holds the urine in.
  2. They have bladders that are a little too small to hold the normal amount of urine.
  3. They make more urine than their normal-size bladders can hold, for several reasons:
    • They may drink too much. Drinking in the two hours before bed increases nighttime urine production.
    • They may be consuming a diuretic medication, a substance that directly increases urine output. Usually these are not prescribed medications, but caffeinated cola drinks or chocolate.
    • They may make more urine in response to a chronic disease such as diabetes or a chronic urinary tract infection.
    • They may make more urine than average because of their hormonal regulatory systems. Babies make about the same amount of urine around-the-clock. Most adults make less urine while they sleep. The reason for this is thought to be a nighttime surge of a hormone called Antidiuretic Hormone (ADH). The levels of ADH found in the blood are higher beginning in the evening. One study looking at ADH levels in bed wetters, compared to controls, found that there was a constant low level of ADH in the bed wetters. The nighttime surge did not happen. Perhaps this is a reason bed wetters tend to make more urine at night.

If an individual consistently has to urinate at night, one or more of the above three reasons is the cause. The second thing children with PNE have in common is that they don’t wake up when they need to urinate. When infants need to urinate, there is no signal that goes from the bladder to the brain to wake them up. This is wonderful, since they are not yet able to walk to the bathroom and use the toilet! On the other hand, when an adult’s bladder is full at night, there is a signal that goes from the bladder, through the nervous system, up to the brain. This initiates a dream about water, or more specifically, about going to the bathroom. The dream alerts our reticular activating system, which awakens us. We can then get out of bed, walk to the bathroom, and use the toilet. This signaling mechanism comes into play sometime in middle childhood.

For many years, parents of bed-wetting children have claimed that their children were deep sleepers. Physicians have usually disagreed with this, citing evidence from sleep EEGs showing that bed-wetting children went through the same stages of sleep as other children, at the same frequency, and that bed-wetting can occur at any stage of sleep.

I have never heard a parent come in and say, “My child spends too much time in stage four sleep.” They just say that their children are deep sleepers and are difficult to wake up. About a decade ago, researchers in Canada performed a simple, but powerful, study where they put headphones on children in a sleep lab. They began the study by allowing the children to get used to sleeping with the headphones on. Then they began introducing tones through the headphones. They measured the minimum volume it took to wake each child. The study showed that the children in the bed-wetting group were dramatically more difficult to wake up than normal controls — confirming what parents have known for years!

Children who wet the bed at night both need to urinate at night and do not wake up when their bladders are full. These are the only children who wet the bed.

Understanding the causes of bed-wetting can help remove its stigma. You are also now better equipped to evaluate the suggestions people make to you. Effective therapy is aimed at the underlying causes. Most children can be completely dry within 12 weeks.

N.B. As I stated in my earlier answer titled, “Is bed-wetting genetic?”, there is help for children who wet the bed! The biggest hindrances to getting help are the absence of a skilled, empathetic physician, and shame — parents and children are ashamed to bring the subject up with someone who can help. It is up to you to take the first step! Talk with your doctor. If you find that for some reason she or he is not able to get your child dry quickly and effectively, I would call the closest Children’s Hospital to find out who treats bed-wetting issues.

Dr. Alan Greene

Dr. Greene is the founder of DrGreene.com (cited by the AMA as “the pioneer physician Web site”), a practicing pediatrician, father of four, & author of Raising Baby Green & Feeding Baby Green. He appears frequently in the media including such venues as the The New York Times, the TODAY Show, Good Morning America, & the Dr. Oz Show.

  1. JaChelle

    Please help me understand. I used to wet the bed from tge ages 6- 13. And then it stopped. Now I’m 16 going on 17 it just now it came back. Im not stressed out or anything I just don’t understand what’s going on. I don’t know if I left a wet towel on the bed or not because my pants are dry except on the side I was lying on. I don’t know if I had a wet dream or not but I just need some answers because this is starting to get out of hand. PLEASE HELP!!

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  2. mayat

    hi dr greene….am 19 years old
    i do wet the bed sometimes at night only…i don’t know what to do about it..i can’ t talk to anyone about it because i am embarrased…it affects my social life because i am in the university and i find it difficult to stay in the hostel or spend a nite out at a friend’s place…i really need help to know what exactly is wrong with me because it is really affecting my life

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  3. Elizabeth

    Hello,
    My son has been fully potty trained for over four months, night and day, He had been keeping his pull up dry during nap and night time, I started putting him in underwear at night and he did well. I noticed this past weekend he would wake up in the morning soaked. This seemed unusual to happen all of a sudden. He is not sick, nor does he seem to be coming down with anything. His dad lives away monday through friday for work, and comes home during the weekends,I am not sure if the cause of this has something to do with that ,I do not really know if its an emotional factor or what? Please help!

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    • sj

      I’m not sure if it will solve this, but after my daughter goes to sleep at 8, I get her up when I go to bed, usually around 10pm, to go to the bathroom. This helps empty her bladder of anything she drank at dinner time or just before bed. Obviously, she goes to the bathroom before she falls asleep at 8 to, but I find she usually has a relatively full bladder at 10 when I have her go. Good luck!!!

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  4. zel

    My child never peed in bed, but now, when he turns 3, he does, but not at our home. It’s just when we go sleep somewhere else. What is the reason?

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  5. kakoli mondal

    Hi Dr. I am a staff nurse, my son is 8 years running, wets hardly once or twice in a month at night as well as day time in coaching class. His abdomen is enlarged than other boys since infant period, gripping teeth at night. We all take tab albendazole 6 month interval as we live in worm infested area. Family history of enuresis up to 10 years present. Milestones are normal. He suffered from throat and cough, fever, spread redness after DPT vaccination. What can I do to stop bed wetting?

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  6. Concerned Grandparent

    I’ve unsubscribed to this newsletter, because I have not received a response.

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    • I’m sorry you weren’t able to find the help you need at DrGreene.com. I suggest you log on to HealthTap and post your question there. They have a large number of doctors answering questions and may be able to help you.

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  7. Concerned Grandparent

    My daughter recently got engaged to a man whom has an 8 year old daughter. My daughter has 2 sons, 3 & 1 1/2 years old. The 8 year old has had many issues growing up.

    Her biological mother abandoned her very early on. She has had 2 women live with them over the years and one other step-mother. The 8 year old still wets the bed and herself during the day. She has stolen from her father, a store and I caught her trying to steal from me. Now she is stealing food from the pantry and storing it in her room. She has done this before.

    She no longer has friends at school. I’m not sure exactly why, but she never meets a stranger. When she gets upset she screams and jumps up and down, like a tantrum. I’ve never seen an 8 year old do this before, but she does it very often.

    She has researched the internet for pictures of nude men (boys). When my grandson goes to the bathroom, she tries to peek in. It’s very disturbing to me.

    She has ADHD and is on meds for that. She has also seen a psychiatrist for these other issues, but she would only see her once a month and nothing is happening with her getting better or them accessing her and determining what is wrong.

    At first I thought she is just doing these things for attention, but now it’s just getting old and she doesn’t care that she gets in trouble for doing bad things. My daughter has tried loving her and giving her extra attention. She would fix her hair for school and it would look so cute and then the 8 yr old would just pull it all out right before school.

    I know her father has spoiled her some, since he has been on his own with her from an early age, but I think she may be bipolar. Should we seek a professional that will do a more extensive evaluation quicker?

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    • Carla

      As a former foster parent, this sounds very much like the 8 yr. old was sexually abused or observed sexual activity at an earlier age. I would suggest she get a physical and into therapy.

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  8. Hope

    My daughter is 7 years old. Her father is very sporadic with seeing her and recently (6 months ago) lost the ability to see her without supervision due to drug use and a court order. He only calls her about once every 2 weeks, sometimes less than that. I’ve noticed a connection with her bed wetting and those phone calls. She only has accidents on nights after he has called her or when she has been asking about why he hasn’t called her. She had far more frequent accidents when she was seeing him regularly, but that hasn’t happened for almost a year.

    I read how stress can be a cause of bed wetting, as well as your other post on sexual abuse. When she did have visits with her father, she would always come home subdued and quiet. Often times even wetting the bed several nights in a row after a long weekend with him. She would tell me stories about how her daddy would tell her to tell him if anyone touched her down there because he would hurt them if they did. When I was still married to him he was abusive to me and I even had a DVO against him. She has never had bruises when coming home from him, but I know he was verbally abusive to me as well. Should I be concerned?

    I have brought as much as I can forward to the judge on our case and there is an order for her father to only get 1 hour supervised visits, but then what? Should I take my daughter to a specialist for bed wetting? Or do I need to find her a counselor to speak with? If I should be concerned with him, I only have so much time before he has unsupervised visits again. He always plays the victim at our hearings. Claiming he just wants to see his child. I always speak to her safety, but only after he was arrested was I able to get a stop to his overnight visits. This has been a battle for the past 6.5 years.

    I want my child to be safe and happy, but I don’t know what to do about the bed wetting and her estranged father. Any advise you have would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

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  9. mrs flisher

    My 8 year old daughter keeps wetting the bed. Some time she wets 3 or 4 times a night and she will be sick as well. I took her to my doctors, but they have not suggested anything. Please can you help at all? I have tried everything I can think of.

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  10. Jamie

    Dr. Greene, I am a bit older (19) and have never considered myself a bedwetter aside from several accidents when I was between 5 and 8. I’d be dry for several years, but then out of the blue I’d have an accident. I’m sure one or two accidents a year don’t make you a bedwetter, but what would be the cause of this? Even stranger, and lucky for me, is that they seem to be incomplete accidents. In other words I’m jolted awake 1-3 seconds after I feel myself start to pee in my dream, where I am surprised that I have no more urine to pass, so I don’t even need to hold anything or run to the bathroom. You said bedwetters wet when their bladders are full and released while sleeping. If my bladder isn’t full how can I be having small accidents like that?

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  11. DryBuddyEZ

    Good post! I would advice parents to never use any form of punishment for your bedwetting child. Also, use a bedwetting alarm to help their kids learn how to wake up when wetting is occurring.

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  12. Katherine Anthony

    I have a baby boy after 10 years. He’s going to be 1 year next month, I went through Caesarean section, but I cannot lose my baby weight after my delivery. I’m breastfeeding my baby since delivery. I was thin before my pregnancy. What is the reason and what I should do to reduce my weight? Thank you.

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  13. sara mc

    Hi Dr, Greene, my 9 yr old daughter is a bed wetter and now is getting horrible looking rashes on her inner thighs? Hydro cort is not working…what do you think this could be?? Thanks – you are the best!!!!!!!

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  14. kerron cummings

    i still dont understand why im wetting the bed
    im 14 years old
    im overweight
    i wet the bed everynite

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    • Alan Greene

      Kerron, wetting the bed every night can be discouraging. If it’s always happened (PNE, as described above) it’s the intersection of two things: needing to pee at night, and not waking up when needing to pee. This happens for around 1-2% of all 14-year-olds. It’s worth seeing a doc who treats enuresis to see what can be changed to solve this.

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