In light of some of the really important questions you answer on this page, I feel a little silly even asking this, but . . . I am a working mom and I'm starting to freak out about Christmas. Do you have any suggestions for ways to make the holidays special and not too out of control? I really want my kids to have a great time, and I'm not very creative, so I'd appreciate any ideas you can give me. Oh, by the way, my husband's work schedule is even worse than mine, so he doesn't have a lot of time either.

The holidays are here again already! Scenes from this time of year form many of my most vivid memories from childhood. The remaining days of this season will fly by ever so quickly. Take a moment to decide what few holiday activities you definitely don't want to miss in the rush of the season. And when holiday magic does happen, don't be tricked into rushing on by!

Holidays with kids can be the most wonderful and the most exhausting time of the year. The key to making this a magical time is planning ahead.

(Note: Many of our readers may not celebrate Christmas, but the general principles outlined below can be applied to any holiday. The specific activities will, of course, be different, but that is what gives us rich cultural diversity.)

Make a list of all the things you would love to do this holiday season. Go ahead and dream big. (Since you mentioned that you were short on ideas, I've included some possibilities for your list). Now, prioritize. If you could only do one thing, what would it be? Then if you could do one more thing, what would that be? Keep asking this question until you've gotten through the entire list. Have your husband do the same thing. Next, sit down with your husband (preferably after the kids are in bed) and compare your lists. You may find that there is something very important to your husband that you didn't even consider. Be sure you try to look at things from your kids' perspective as well. Maybe the thing a seven-year-old wants to do is see real snow (especially if you are from a warm-weather state like California), while a five-year-old may be delighted by a family trip to the movies.

Now, taking all this into consideration, decide together how you will spend the limited time you have during this busy season. You will probably need to eliminate several things at the bottom of your list. You may decide that the most important thing for your family is a big feast on Christmas Day. Since most of the work involved must be done later in the month, your family will probably have time to do some other things earlier in the month. If you have more time than your husband does, you may be able to do some of the preparation for family activities, or you and the kids may do some things without him. Be sure to add at least one activity just for you and your husband, even if it is brief -- get a sitter and do something special as a couple.

Putting together a dream list and prioritizing it is very important. One of the reasons we often feel overwhelmed by the season is that we try to do everything -- everything doesn't make the holiday special, but a few things can, if they are chosen carefully.

Here is our dream list:

• Have professional family photos taken. Frame them and include them in the holiday decorations.
• Decorate the house with lots of evergreen so that the house smells like a forest.
• Decorate the house with moving holiday displays.
• Drive to a Christmas tree farm out in the country and cut a tree.
• Play Christmas music while we decorate the tree, and when we are done, have everyone stand around it holding hands, and sing "Oh, Christmas Tree"!
• String lights all over the outside of our house.
• Shop for presents for everyone on our gift list.
• Make wrapping paper and wrap each gift.
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