Surviving Motherhood by Asking for Help

I am very excited to write for this week. I am a young mother (27 years) of three very young children. Lizzie is 4 years old, David 2, and Lucy is 8 months. I am always on the search for healthy ways to increase my energy (and getting more rest, while the best way, is not always possible).

Even more than physical health, I am constantly monitoring my emotional health. My biggest fear is that I will be so stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed that I will over react to small mishaps. My kids need a level-headed mother, someone that uses logic more than emotions to handle daily life.

This week I will be sharing 5 tips I learned that help me not go insane with such young children.

The first: ask for help.

I was in the airport, putting Lucy in my Ergo baby carrier. As I was reaching behind my back to clip it, I heard a voice behind me say, “Can I help you with that?”

I smiled and responded, “sure, thank you! Usually I can do this pretty quickly on my own.”

He kindly clipped it and said, “Yes, moms can do anything on their own.”

Don’t we think that? How many of us moms think we can do anything and everything on our own?

Some people think asking for help admits your weakness. For me though, I am always admitting my inabilities, so that is not it! My problem is that I don’t want to inconvenience anyone else. I don’t want to interrupt someone’s life by calling them and asking them to watch my kids so I can go grocery shopping.

First, it is not an inconvenience if you ask someone that has had children before. They can relate and empathize and feel amazing if they give the help they wish they had received.

But I also discovered something: If I offer to help my friends out, I feel like I am not using them as much. So I will call Tasha, ask her if she needs to go shopping and then the next time I need to go somewhere I know who to ask.

Of course, I really just need to get over it and pick up that phone and ask. That time of getting the help I need is irreplaceable! I am so much stronger and able to accomplish more when I accept the help instead of banging my head against the wall trying to do it myself.

What about you? Do you ask for help? How did you overcome that first initial fear of it?

Published on: August 29, 2011
About the Author
Photo of Annie Shultz

Annie fell in love with words at a young age, knowing early she wanted to be a writer. She lives in the Kansas woods where she documents her life through the lens of her camera and the clicks of her keyboard.

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