I am fond of prefacing conversations about eating disorders with: “If, everything you know about eating disorders you learned from an ABC Afterschool Special or Lifetime TV movie, you don’t know anything.” A frightening aspect of this disease is that most people—including doctors and other clinicians—wrongly assume full authority on the topic.
Many people don’t remember that until Rain Man came out in 1988, society largely thought autism was caused by cold, unfeeling “refrigerator” mothers. Eating disorders need a blockbuster movie — if you’re a movie producer, call me!
Just How Thin Was She?
My daughter was very sick and that’s sufficient. Numbers and photos serve no purpose beyond to shock and fascinate. You can’t tell by looking at someone the state of his/her physical or mental health. One thing I will say: ours is the only case I know of where both parents and pediatrician recognized the problem almost immediately and access to top-notch treatment was both readily available and utilized.
Everyone Knows You Can’t Make Someone Want Help
If you have the misfortune of suffering from a misunderstood disease, it sure helps if you have a mother who reads widely on and is teasingly called “Google Mom” for her research abilities. Even before the diagnosis “anorexia” came from the pediatrician, I was online searching for information about a treatment I’d read about that was showing promise.
Thankfully, in our case, unlike most others, our doctor both knew of Maudsley aka Family Based Treatment, and supported the treatment model; additionally, one of the world’s leading research and treatment centers was at University of California at San Diego just 20 minutes from our home. The final blessing was we had both good insurance and resources for out-of-pocket expenses.
The Underlying Cause
This is where I hit you with some facts and a great big truth: Eating disorders don’t need an “underlying cause” to develop—one happened to my child and one can happen to yours.
- Eating disorders are biological brain-based illnesses and up to 80% of their cause is genetics.
- What are commonly thought to be causes of eating disorders are symptoms of eating disorders.
- Eating disorders are triggered by a period of malnutrition and or weight/loss. This can be through illness, increased exercise or diet.
- Diets/disordered eating are related to eating disorders only in that, for those genetically vulnerable, a diet will trigger the eating disorder.
- To reiterate bullet point number 2, need for control is a symptom of an eating disorder, not a cause.
- Eating disorders are not a choice and are unrelated to vanity.
- Eating disorders strike females, males, people of color, and even poor people in Africa (I include this preemptively as there is always one commenter telling me that if I’d just have sent my daughter to Africa to see people who were starving, this would cure her anorexia).
Does reading this make you wonder what misconceptions you might have? I’d love to offer some clarification or answers to your questions.