Open the pages of any glossy magazine and you will see photographs of beautiful celebrities, blooming in their pregnancy or photographed with their gorgeous offspring, all clean, fresh and serene. I write this whilst watching Mr and Mrs Smith on the Television, starring the ultimate icon to parenting perfection, Angelina Jolie.

Now don’t get me wrong. I love Angelina, and I am well aware that for celebrities, looking good and being in shape is their job, so getting back to size zero is apriority aided by their team of chefs, trainers and personal assistants, all ready to slap their wrist as they reach for the chocolate and proffer a packet of nuts instead.

However as with the effect that skinny catwalk models on the self image of most women on the planet, these perfectly yummy mothers can make the rest of us feel awfully inadequate. We all want to regain some degree of body confidence. We also want our babies to sleep well, feed well, be intellectually superior and surpass all others in their developmental milestones....

Or so it would seem

I have one child an 18 month old girl but even then I have experienced the competitiveness of some mothers.

‘oh my son is now crawling everywhere. Oh yours hasn’t started yet?...’

‘Is your daughter talking yet? Oh mine is starting to put 2 words together...’

And I hear from friends with older children that it gets exponentially worse at the school gate. Particularly as examinations loom or on placement to higher schools or college.

And then there is what we feed our children. Do you feel guilty admitting if you have used pre prepped food for your children, or admitting how much TV you let them watch? According to recent surveys many mothers feel so much pressure to be perfect that they admit to white lies to cover up their perceived parenting inadequacies, covering up how much time they spend playing with their children and playing down financial concerns.

Why do we feel unable to be honest with fellow mothers? I suppose as one of my friends (a friend before mummyhood!) put it, you do not have to be friends with other mothers simply because they are mothers of children your child attends school or nursery with. Simply focus on those you really like and those who are parents of your children’s’ friends. This is something that has helped her resist caving in to the school gate mafia and to forge new, honest and meaningful friendships as her children progress through playgroups and schools. What are your thoughts on why we feel the need to cover up and why we may feel inadequate compared to our peers?

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