Dear Tamyra, Once again, I appreciate your detailed insights! When I first read what you wrote, I remember thinking that my friends, especially in the Indian community, family, and I have debated all the pros and cons that you mention regarding arranged marriages for years. And I still haven't come to any definitive conclusion! I have observed what Indians call "love marriages" and that are in line with our Western notions of matchmaking work or fail, and "arranged marriages" that have been successful or failed also. I think what works ultimately depends on the two people involved and whether they are playing by the same rules and expectations. What I have witnessed in India is that, though a marriage might be arranged, the prospective bride and groom still usually have the right to decline or consent to the match. I have also noticed that "love marriages" with dating beforehand, have been on the rise in India, especially with increasing coeducation and opportunities for young men and women to comingle in college and the work place. All these issues have been the subject of deep interest and debate for Indian immigrants raising their children in the West, especially as their children approach the teen years. Should their teens be allowed to date? What about going to dances and the prom? When the time comes to marry, should they find partners with similar cultural heritage, or does that matter? These are not easy questions to negotiate, and I have seen such the gamut of responses to them among the Indian diaspora over the years. Sometimes, the result is tension, misunderstanding, and strain on the relationships between the generations. My hope is that parents will keep the lines of communication open and encourage their second-generation children to express their feelings and opinions on the topic early on, even before the teenage years, in age-appropriate ways. Sincerely, Vasuki