As a pediatric specialist, and mother to a child who was diagnosed with diabetes at a young age, I have a deep understanding of how parents strive to do everything they can to help their children. I also appreciate how dealing with a sudden and serious illness can bring on feelings of powerlessness.

Many moms and dads delve into research and read everything they come across. There is no right way to handle news of this nature. Yet, although every diagnosis and journey is unique, the knowledge that no one is alone is a powerful force and integral to coping with serious illness.

Everything Changes – The “New Normal”

When my son was diagnosed with type-one diabetes, the whole family went through a period of adjustment. Suddenly there was a new dynamic in the house, a new level of caring, and a new level of worry. What parent wouldn’t trade places with their afflicted child, carrying the burden themselves in exchange for a child’s health?

The moment illness strikes, life becomes split into two sections: before and after. And we all yearn to get back to before. Before was a time of blissful unawareness.

It’s not possible to go back to before, of course. The power is in the after, which is the present and the future. Life does go on, and eventually your family’s new normal feels just that way . . . normal.

Finding A Supportive Community

Meeting other parents of children with diabetes was so beneficial. I learned helpful tips like the best snacks to pack for vacations and how to better help my son regulate his insulin.

Joining a support group made us both feel that we were not alone. Not only did we share tips and resources, we also became a group that could comfort one another, whether with laughter or tears.

Not Who I Am, Just One Part of Me

This new invader in our family became another thing in the background. Sure, my son’s health will always be at the top of my priorities, but our lives didn’t have to revolve around it. We could still be ourselves and live our lives. Diabetes became a part of my son’s identity, but it didn’t become his whole identity.

My daughter, too, has a new part to her identity. She’s participated in several diabetes fundraisers, and she underwent a needle stick of her own for TrialNet, a type 1 diabetes clinical trial that is helping to determine risk factors in family members as well as studying prevention, delay, and reverse progression.

(If you’d like to get involved, there may be a clinical center near you that is conducting the trial. Visit diabetestrialnet.org to learn more.)

Gaining Wisdom

Understanding medical information is crucial for children who are living with a disease like diabetes. Knowledge is power, and as girls and boys learn more about their illnesses, they become empowered to live with confidence and without worry.

As a doctor and a mother, I know that it can be hard to cope with your feelings as a parent of a child with diabetes. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and to utilize your support systems. It will get better. It will get easier. What are you doing to adjust your life and deal with your child’s diabetes?

One of the hardest things to do as a parent of a child with an illness is to let go of control and have faith that the other adults in their life will take good care of them.

This is especially difficult when your child is at school for 8 hours a day.

So how can parents make sure their children’s medical needs are being met at school?

Put Your Child in Control

Your child has a lot to worry about – school, friends, after school activities – you don’t want to over-burden them with responsibilities pertaining to their health as well. But the fact it children are more capable than we often give them credit for.

By putting your child in the driver’s seat, you ensure that they can remind teachers and caregivers of their medical issues when the time is crucial. We hear all time about young children, sometimes 5-years old and younger, who save their parent’s lives by calling 911 just in time.

Teaching your child about their illness and educating them about their own treatment is not a burden, it’s a gift. It will help them stay healthy and take control over their own life.

Create an Open Dialogue With Adults at School

When your child is dealing with an illness, the school nurse will become your best friend. Most school nurses are very compassionate and caring (otherwise they would have chosen another profession) but it never hurts to go out of your way and buy the nurse a Christmas gift.

Make an effort to establish a personal connection with the school nurse, administrators and teachers. Explain to them right away what your child is going through and make sure you have reliable emergency contacts, should anything happen during the school day.

How do you make sure your child get the necessary medical care during school hours?

When a child falls ill, they are thrust into an adult world of doctor’s appointments, injections, medications and hospitals. Oftentimes a child struggling with illness doesn’t have enough energy to play – but playtime is an essential part of childhood and is beneficial both physically and mentally – especially when a child is ill.

So what can we do as parents to help our children maintain their sense of childish wonderment in the face of grown-up medical issues?

Finding The Right Care Facilities

In the memorable and heartfelt movie Patch Adams starring Robin Williams he says, “if you want to be a doctor you have to learn how to treat the patient as well as the disease.” In my time working with children as a radiation oncologist, I have seen that personally connecting with young patients is a great way to help them get better.

As a parent, your first priority when your child is diagnosed with a serious disease should be to try and find the best doctors and hospitals you can. Many children’s hospitals are operated specifically with children in mind and aren’t as scary as the adult versions.

Laughter Is The Best Medicine

Recent scientific studies have proven that laughter has both physical and emotional benefits. In fact, it appears that laughing has a similar effect on the body as working out.

If your child isn’t well enough to go outside, run around, and physically exert themselves giving them plenty of opportunities to laugh is a great way to ensure they stay healthy. Pick out some silly movies, play charades, hire a magician or clown to make an appearance, or bring them to a comedy club!

Furry Friend Therapy

Getting a pet for your child is a great way to provide them with more time to play. Even if your child suffers from pet allergies, there are plenty of great pets out there for them – fish, salamanders, and turtles all make great hypoallergenic pets.

Having another creature to care for can also help take your child’s mind off of their own illness and provide them with a sense of control. Just make sure you have the time to help them take care of the pet on the days they’re really feeling sick.

Can you think of any other ways to help maintain playfulness when your child falls ill? It could be anything from reading a book to baking a cake!

So your child has been diagnosed with an illness – you’ve helped them learn all there is to know about their treatment and have set up a routine to ensure they are managing their symptoms. But your child still doesn’t completely understand their illness and certainly won’t be able to explain it to their teachers and classmates.

You’re not alone! 1 in every 400 children has diabetes, 1 in every 13 children suffers from allergies, and nearly 10% of children have been diagnosed with asthma. As a parent, sending your child back to school with an illness can be terrifying but you can help by letting their teachers and classmates know what’s going on.

Manage, Arrange, Coordinate

Coordinating a meeting with your child, their teachers and the school nurse is very important to make sure that everyone is on the same page.

Provide school administrators with written directives including: medicines that can be given for certain situations, how to administer the medicine, how to get a hold of the parents, guardians, and emergency contacts, and when to call 911.

Allergies and Diabetes

In the case of allergies, avoidance issues need to be discussed. If the school doesn’t already have a system in place for protecting allergic children from peanuts, dairy and other common food allergies, have a conversation about how this can best be accomplished.

For diabetes, school caretakers need to be aware of how to recognize high and low blood sugars. Let teachers know that the child and nurse should be made aware of impromptu class parties so they can implement appropriate blood sugar checks, and necessary insulin dosage – let them eat cake, healthily!

Work with school officials to set up a routine for your child where there is a mid morning snack, blood check before lunch, and insulin delivery with any carbs they may eat. Checking blood sugar before exercise is also important because they may need a snack.

Involve Your Child

Encourage your child to talk to his or her classmates and teachers and not to be afraid to answer any questions they may have about the illness. It isn’t something to be ashamed of and it’s not who they are, just something they have to learn to live with. As a parent, what do you do to help your child’s teachers and classmates understand their illness?

Going back to school after 3 long months of beaches, popsicles, fireworks and freedom can be a difficult transition for even the healthiest child but for a child dealing with a new diagnosis, going back to school can seem downright daunting.

As a pediatric oncologist and mother to 2 children who’ve had their fair share of illnesses, I know firsthand how hard it is to watch your kids return to school when they are coping with allergies, asthma, or even cancer. By following the advice below, I hope to help ease some of the guilt and anxiety parents may be feeling.

Knowledge Is Power

Talk to your children about their illness and explain to them that there are many other children (and even adults!) who have had to go through the same things. This will help to demystify their illness

Familiarize your child with their medications and spend some time over the summer creating a structured routine. If they have a specific medicine schedule during the summer, then the transition into the school year will be less shocking for them.

Discuss With Their Friends

A week or so before school starts have your child’s closest friends over for a fun sleepover or barbecue party. The key here is to make sure they’re having

If your child is returning to school with a close group of friends that they can trust and rely on, it will make them feel safe and comfortable. While it’s good to make sure their friends know about their medical issues, it’s best not to single them out and make a big deal out of it.

Keep Them Connected

If your child is going back to school mid-way through the year or will be missing a lot of school throughout the year due to doctor’s appointments and sick days, make sure you keep them connected through social media.

Ask the teachers to encourage your child’s classmates to stay in touch via emails, letters, and even Facebook, to help keep your child involved in the classroom community.

Don’t Stress!

Try and stay as stress-free as possible. As a parent, anything you feel will automatically be transferred to your child. Take care of yourself – get as much sleep as you can, and find support groups to help you. Do you have any other thoughts on how to stay stress-free while helping your child go back to school?